What Kind of Golf is This??

Fore! Whether golf makes you feel Happy Gilmore, Mad Gilmore, or any other member of the Gilmore family, it’s hard to ignore it. While I’m not an avid golfer, I’ve been keen about the idea of trying disc golf again sometime. I played it once years ago with Canadian Tire™ frisbees and let me tell you, not all frisbees are made equal. Though if you toss your good driving frisbee into a water hazard, it probably stings a little more than a golf ball would.

This week’s puzzle is the strangest version of golf you’ll ever play. Put away your golf clubs, take out your golf pencil, and let’s get solving. ⛳

Discussion (and spoilers!) below the break.

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What Kind of Golf Is This?? by Brandon Cathcart

Discussion

Wait, there’s barely any music references in this puzzle? Who wrote this? Alas, not every puzzle is ripe for musical genius. I did get to add some fun references into this one, like one of my favourite shows growing up, Futurama. This puzzle also feels very Canadian - there are several Canada-specific clues for you to puzzle through!

Today’s Theme

The four theme clues start with HOLE GOAL, which in golf is PAR. The goal of a PAR 3 hole is to get it in three strokes. In this puzzle, instead of strokes, you have different goals. The answer 14-Across, for example, is PARSNIP - but the clue [HOLE GOAL: Make a quick cut] tells you it should be read as PAR SNIP. Similarly, we have PAR BOIL, PAR KING, and PAR TIED to round out our 4-hole course.

Behind the Clues

1A. Ah, the original iPhone. Were you alive when it came out? I don’t know how old you are, but when accelerometers were first added to smartphones, people were so excited. [You can get one that makes your phone look like you're drinking a beer] is an APP - so while your friends thought you were getting super drink, you were actually just holding your phone up to your face and tipping it back! That’s innovation.

12A. I’ve mentioned the video game Hades in a previous puzzle, mostly because it’s my favourite, modern link to the pantheon of Greek gods. The [God of war featured in the game "Hades"] is ARES, and while he’s not my favourite god in the game, he’s got his moments.

30A. There’s a good chance this tripped you up! Maybe you’ve heard the term for a [Barre bend] in ballet before, but have you seen it written? Especially without the accent over the “e”, it looks weird… but PLIÉ (pronounced plea - eh) is your French word of the day.

3D. [Solving a Rubik's Cube or doing a back flip, e.g.] Not only was I excited to get PARTY TRICK into a crossword, but it could be considered a “secret” hole on this course - PAR TYTRICK… Maybe it doesn’t actually work, but still.

7D. Nintendogs! Man, another nostalgia clue for only some solvers. I remember the launch of Nintendogs and it went hard. I wanted a Nintendo DS just for that. Didn’t get one, at the time… But maybe I can scoop one up on Marketplace now… 👀

15D. While admittedly it isn’t my favourite sketch, I couldn’t pass up the reference. ["Sloppy" ones are ordered rare and covered in water, according to Tim Robinson] is STEAKS, as in Sloppy Steaks. One day I’ll get to reference my favourite ones, but for now, this’ll do.

I hope you enjoyed this puzzle!

Until next Friday,

Brandon